Hollywood seems to be on a fairy tale kick these days and when one studio is on a kick, the others have to follow suit to compete. Last year we had competing Snow White movies and the first movie to follow suit this year is "Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters", an R-rated take on the classic fairy tale. As a reminder, Hansel and Gretel are the two twins who stumble across a house made of candy in the forest and commence to eating before they realize that they are enjoying the spells of an evil witch. That is pretty much how this movie starts out as well, but after that, the fairytale is elaborated upon to say the least.
Hansel and Gretel are legendary witch hunters when the movie picks up in the middle of a small town about to burn a supposed-witch at the stake. The town has had a rash of child abductions and in classic witch movie fashion, they are out for blind justice on whatever witch they can get their hands on. Jeremy Renner (Hansel) and Gemma Arterton (Gretel) play the title roles and they bring a strong level of coolness to a movie that is already loaded with coolness.
The movie starts off fast and never slows down. The action is fast and furious and the 3D is exceptional. The action scenes are quick and entertaining, although much of the moments are lost with edits that are too quick. Things come hurtling toward your face and to say the least, the 3D works well. Just because a movie is loaded with non-stop coolness and special effects doesn’t mean that it is without flaw though.
"Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters" is 95 minutes of entertainment and excitement. The villain, Muriel, played by Famke Janssen, is exciting and dangerous. You fear her after the first time she single-handedly annihilates a group of witch hunters. Unfortunately though, that is the only real emotion I ever felt in the movie. The movie never slowed down to establish a connection with its title characters and the audience. When their lives are in jeopardy or their friend’s lives are in jeopardy, it never once pulled my emotional string. They justify that emotion as well, by not caring either.
"Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters" is a fun trip to the movies, but when it’s over, it’s over. You won’t care about it anymore. It won’t live on in conversation with any of your friends. It garners only a shrug of the shoulders and a quick, "Ehh." It’s too bad too because it is also one of those movies that had the potential to be great. The director obviously knew what he was doing visually, but was too wrapped up in looking cool that he forgot to make people care.
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